Archive for the 'People' Category

Fairy Tales

I read a fairy tale entitled: “I’m The Perfect Leader” and then I realized it was just a fairy tale.

Then I read another one, “I’m the Perfect Speaker” and then I realized it was just a fairy tale.

The next, “I’m The Perfect Husband” and you guessed it – it was a fairy tale.

Tried one more: “I’m The Perfect Dad”.

There are fairy tales and then there are realities.

The reality is, I’m not perfect in any area of my life.  I don’t have to be; I just need to be in the pursuit of excellence. Isn’t it amazing that we can still be anything we want and we don’t have to be perfect?  Even with our imperfections, we can offer something of value to others.

The next time you start to criticize someone for their imperfections, stop and remember: It’s better to be thought a fool than to open your mouth and prove it!

And these are just my thoughts on a Monday morning!

THE PEOPLE BUILDER,

Steve Siemens, CSP

The Other Twelve-Step Program

The Pork industry has done a good job in their marketing of pork.  It’s the other white meat! I’d like to suggest the Other Twelve-Step Program but this one is for people building skills.

1. Treat people with respect.  Treat others as you wish to be treated.

2. Don’t believe anything you hear, okay, don’t believe 98% of what you hear.

3. If you repeat stuff you’ve heard about others, you’re a gossip.

4. Look for the best in other always.  Please remember: no one is completely worthless, they can always serve as a bad example.

5. Listen with your eyes.

6. Find ways to encourage people around you on a regular basis.  You might choose to do it daily, weekly, monthly or occasionally but as Nike says….!

7. Honor people.  See and speak about their value and worth as a person.

8. Be patient, kind, and keep no record of wrongs.

9. For me, it is important to look at others through the eyes of Jesus.

10. See MMFINA on every person’s forehead:  Make Me Feel Important, Needed and Accepted.

11. Work daily to help others succeed.

12. When in doubt, see # 1.

And these are just my thoughts on a Tuesday evening.

THE PEOPLE BUILDER,

Steve Siemens, CSP

The ABZs Of Powerful Living

In the alphabetical list of ingredients for powerful living is found a “G” word.  It is the difference maker in so many things.  G-R-A-T-I-T-U-D-E!  It is a word that needs to be practiced more today than ever.

We stand in front of full and overflowing closets and say, “I have nothing to wear!”  We get in our car and travel miles away and complain our butts are sore.  We board a plane and go places our ancestors would have never dreamed of going and complain about delays.  The garbage disposals in most restaurants eat better than 30% of the people in the world.

The word gratitude according to the dictionary means

* An appreciative attitude for what we have received
* A warm or deep appreciation of personal kindness
* A disposition to express gratefulness by giving thanks

Characteristics of a Grateful Life:

1.  A sense of purpose in their lives.

Grateful people report higher levels of positive emotions, life satisfaction, vitality, optimism and lower levels of depression and stress.  They have a reason to get out of bed each morning.  Their gratitude appears to enhance pleasant feeling states more than it diminishes unpleasant emotions.  Grateful people do not deny or ignore the negative aspects of life.  They understand life is not fair, they don’t expect it to be fair and they learn lessons in all things.  When you have developed a crystal clear understanding that all things work for the greater good no matter how seemingly bad things may appear, it becomes much easier to stay in a state of gratitude.  The greatest pain is pain with no purpose.

2. An appreciation for the people around them.

Grateful individuals place less importance on material goods knowing that success is not measured in terms of possessions accumulated.  They are less envious of others and are more likely to share their possessions with others.   They love people, not things.  They value their friendships, both new and old.

3. A willingness to actively show the gratitude they feel.

People with a strong disposition toward gratitude have the capacity to be empathetic and to take the perspective of others.  They are rated as more generous and more helpful by people in their social networks. (McCullough, Emmons, & Tsang, 2002)

“To educate yourself for the feeling of gratitude means to take nothing for granted, but to always seek out and value the kind that will stand behind the action.  Nothing that is done for you is a matter of course.  Everything originates in a will for the good, which is directed at you.  Train yourself never to put off the word or action for the expression of gratitude.”  Albert Schweitzer

“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life.  It turns what we have into enough, and more.  It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity.  It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend.  Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.”  Melody Beattie

Just make up your mind that if you have nothing to be grateful for, there is something wrong with you.

Do you want to live powerfully?  Live with gratitude.  It is a choice!

And these are my thoughts on a Wednesday morning.

THE PEOPLE BUILDER,
Steve Siemens, CSP

Remodel Your Thinking

Mary Kay Ash said it best when she said, “If you think you can’t, you’re right!”  Dale Carnegie said, “Remember happiness doesn’t depend on who you are or what you have: it depends solely upon what you think.”  And Shakespeare said it this way, “Nothing is good or bad, but thinking makes it so.”

There is no such thing as a bad day.  If you don’t think every day is a good day, just try missing one.   You might label your job as boring. Sixty percent of the people in America today don’t like going to work according to the radio show I was listening to.  You might label something demeaning, ugly, bad, or a problem.  Remember Shakespeare?  Stuff isn’t good or bad – it’s our thinking that determines the assignment.

The happiest people are those who think the most interesting thoughts. Those who decide to grow mentally every day, who love good conversation, listen to good music, read good books, focus on beauty, and have amazing friends.  And they are not only happy in themselves, they are the cause of happiness in others.  Why?  Shakespeare?

So in a world where ninety-five percent of what you see, hear, and read is negative, maybe it’s time to remodel our thinking.  Maybe it’s time to stop assigning the “negative” to the situation.

The following parable offers a good example of why it’s important to remodel our thinking:

A wise old farmer was considered rich by the villagers because he owned a horse. One day the horse ran away and the villagers said to the farmer, “How unfortunate, your horse ran away.” He responded, “How do you know it’s unfortunate?”

The next day the horse returned bringing with it a wild horse, thereby increasing the farmer’s wealth. The villagers exclaimed, “How fortunate!” Which, in turn, prompted the farmer to again respond, “How do you know it’s fortunate?”

The following day the farmer’s son, while trying to break in the wild horse, was thrown and broke his leg. The villagers again commented, “How unfortunate!” Once again the farmer responded, “How do you know it’s unfortunate?”

The next day, the king’s men rode through the village conscripting all the young men for service in the army. They didn’t take the farmer’s son because of his broken leg.

The lesson of this parable is best explained by its author, Paul Jacobs, M.D., who said, “Things are not always as they appear to be. Life presents us with situations and conditions that, in themselves, are neither good nor bad. We assign meaning to these conditions, thereby creating our own fortunes and misfortunes.”

According to the Bureau of Standards in Washington, a dense fog covering seven city blocks to a depth of 100 feet is composed of less than one glass of water.  That amount of water is divided into about sixty billion tiny droplets.  Yet when those minute particles steal over a city or the countryside, they can almost blot out everything from your sight.

Wouldn’t it be amazing if we “remodeled” our thinking?  Think of the meaning we would get out of life and our situations.  Think of the fog that would be lifted.

Stay tuned for some “blueprints” for those who are serious about remodeling.

And these are just my thoughts on a Tuesday afternoon.

The People Builder,
Steve Siemens, CSP

How To WIN in 2010!

Everyone likes to win.  In fact, some people will do anything to win.  If you want to win in 2010, I’d like to suggest these thoughts:

1.    It’s more important to be respectful, than to be right.
2.    There are three sides to every issue: side A, side B, and the truth.  Always focus on the truth.
3.    Give people more than they expect and do it with great enthusiasm.
4.    Believe in the impossible.  Mary Kay Ash said it right when she said, “If you think you can’t, you’re right!”
5.    Keep everything in perspective.
6.    Dream daily.  Never laugh at anyone’s dreams.  The poorest people are not people without money or things, they are people without dreams.
7.    Be extravagant at times with your family and friends.
8.    Live wide awake!
9.    Live with passion, work with passion, think with passion, love with passion.
10.    Great love and great achievements require great risks.
11.    When you get that inner urge to connect with someone or do something from them, do it immediately.
12.    Keep spontaneity in your marriage, work, friendships, and life.
13.    Practice FIDO – forget it and drive on!  Develop a good forgetter!
14.    Admit you were wrong when you were wrong and forget it when you were right!
15.    Encourage at least five people every day.
16.    Read good books, listen to good music, and spend quality time with your family and friends.

Do you want to really win?  Look within the word “win” and find the solution.  Ask the question, What’s Important Now?  Ask that question and practice the 16 thoughts above plus a few more, and I believe you will WIN in 2010!

And these are just my thoughts on a Friday, New Year’s Eve morning.

THE PEOPLE BUILDER,
Steve Siemens, CSP